Dorm Life Frustrations
Hi Mom.
I'm blogging tonight mainly because I am so beyond frustrated with living in a dorm. And before you jump to the usual complaints, it actually isn't because of my Bugle Eating, Vampire of a roommate...at least not tonight.
I've been doing really good this past week and half that I've been back at school - as far as the weight loss goes. For those who don't know, over Winter Break I was perscribed Phentermine by my doctor to help with my weightless journey. Because at 4'10 and a 148 lbs I am quite overweight. So, the Phentermine has kicked in and I've lost 4 lbs (I'm sure it's mostly water weight, but I'll take it) so far. And I've been really getting into working out and researching what natural foods are the best and exactly what they do to the body - I'm even thinking of going to the farmer's market this weekend. I even bought natural peanut butter - of course this was before I learned that almond butter is much better for you. One step at a time.
As great as the exercise and research is going, I've hit a brick wall when it comes to actually executing my new knowledge of clean eating because, aside from cheerios, I am dependent on The Hammonds Commons (Ringling's Cafeteria) for the rest of my food. And I know this is going to come as a shocker to everyone, but college food is awful. It's even more awful for someone who knows exactly what white flour and fried food is doing to the body I'm trying so hard to change for the better.
And it's not that there aren't plenty of options. Oh no, Hammonds always has the favorites out: burgers, hot dogs, fries, pizza, and an itty bitty salad bar that usually only carries Cesar Salad, pre-made salads, and the selection of very few veggies and unidentified dressings. And I'm not sure how, but they've managed to screw up raw vegetables. I've never disliked a carrot before coming to Ringling. The glimmering hope is the hot-meal station that changes every day. But of course it's doesn't really change when there's a 1/4 chance it'll either be some kind of pasta (always cold), what the school calls 'Chinese' food, some kind of fried food, or the BBQ day where they brutally castrate Mac and Cheese, slap some barbecue sauce on under cooked chicken and slaughter vegetables into some kind of mush.
My daily meal schedule looks like this:
Breakfast: 1 of 3 kinds of Cheerios (in my room that I bought, so that's always safe)
Lunch: Cesar Salad (which mainly the only reason I get from Hammonds is because SOMETIMES there is tiny amounts of chicken in it, and I usually have to dig through the dish to pick out enough that I get more than one cube). So basically, I get lettuce and chicken (sometimes) from Hammonds, bring back to my room and then use my own croutons (b/c if they have croutons out in the Caf they're usually rock hard) and Cesar Dressing (Bolthouse Cesar Dressing, made with Greek yogurt).
Dinner: tonight I had a bowl of dark chocolate cheerios in my room. Previously, I went to Hammonds, got some kind of pasta (because I really didn't want pizza or hamburger), and knowing I was unlikely to eat the pasta that was limp and looked cold, I also got a whopping 2 meatballs (smothered in what they called, "Kung Pao" sauce) and some white rice (which pained me beyond belief because I had just read about the downfalls of white foods). I wasn't even out of the cafeteria before I knew I probably was not going to be eating the food I'd just been given.
That's another thing: in Hammonds we don't self serve our food. We have to hand our plates/green boxes (which is what you have to use if you don't want to sit in the dining room) to someone behind the counter and point at what you want. And God help you if you ask for less or more than what they give you.
So, back in my room with a box of awful food, I could feel the heartburn before I even started. I took a nibble of the cold pasta, cringed and then attempted the Kung Pao meatballs....bleh. I couldn't bring myself to eat plain rice for dinner. After throwing that away, I turned to my sad storage box on top of my fridge where I keep my small amount of groceries (mainly cheerios and pretzels) and sighed.
I think the most frustrating thing is that I really want and am trying to treat my body better. I love myself and want to be top notch in what is probably the best years of my life, but exercise can only go so far. Exercising without the right nutrients and vitamins is moot. While I may lose the weight now, thanks to Phentermine, if I don't start changing my eating habits, which Ringling is making very difficult, it's all for not. I would chop off my drawing hand for a kitchen with a working stove and oven at this point. And of course it's not like I could get a portable stove, even if my tiny room had the space for it, because it's against the housing policy. I might have caved and gotten a microwave and blender recently, but I just found out I have to get 4 new tires for my car and will also be putting money forward for my apartment next year. Both of which take priority to a microwave.
So I write to you tonight, defeated, frustrated, overwhelmed, underwhelmed, and tirelessly hungry, praying for this semester to go by in a flash so I can come home for the summer and then not have to go back into a kitchen-less living space ever again.
**apologies to the grandparents if this rant was a little graphic and alarming. I'm honestly okay and doing good in my classes, I just tend to get really hangry (hungry + angry).
I'm blogging tonight mainly because I am so beyond frustrated with living in a dorm. And before you jump to the usual complaints, it actually isn't because of my Bugle Eating, Vampire of a roommate...at least not tonight.
I've been doing really good this past week and half that I've been back at school - as far as the weight loss goes. For those who don't know, over Winter Break I was perscribed Phentermine by my doctor to help with my weightless journey. Because at 4'10 and a 148 lbs I am quite overweight. So, the Phentermine has kicked in and I've lost 4 lbs (I'm sure it's mostly water weight, but I'll take it) so far. And I've been really getting into working out and researching what natural foods are the best and exactly what they do to the body - I'm even thinking of going to the farmer's market this weekend. I even bought natural peanut butter - of course this was before I learned that almond butter is much better for you. One step at a time.
As great as the exercise and research is going, I've hit a brick wall when it comes to actually executing my new knowledge of clean eating because, aside from cheerios, I am dependent on The Hammonds Commons (Ringling's Cafeteria) for the rest of my food. And I know this is going to come as a shocker to everyone, but college food is awful. It's even more awful for someone who knows exactly what white flour and fried food is doing to the body I'm trying so hard to change for the better.
And it's not that there aren't plenty of options. Oh no, Hammonds always has the favorites out: burgers, hot dogs, fries, pizza, and an itty bitty salad bar that usually only carries Cesar Salad, pre-made salads, and the selection of very few veggies and unidentified dressings. And I'm not sure how, but they've managed to screw up raw vegetables. I've never disliked a carrot before coming to Ringling. The glimmering hope is the hot-meal station that changes every day. But of course it's doesn't really change when there's a 1/4 chance it'll either be some kind of pasta (always cold), what the school calls 'Chinese' food, some kind of fried food, or the BBQ day where they brutally castrate Mac and Cheese, slap some barbecue sauce on under cooked chicken and slaughter vegetables into some kind of mush.
My daily meal schedule looks like this:
Breakfast: 1 of 3 kinds of Cheerios (in my room that I bought, so that's always safe)
Lunch: Cesar Salad (which mainly the only reason I get from Hammonds is because SOMETIMES there is tiny amounts of chicken in it, and I usually have to dig through the dish to pick out enough that I get more than one cube). So basically, I get lettuce and chicken (sometimes) from Hammonds, bring back to my room and then use my own croutons (b/c if they have croutons out in the Caf they're usually rock hard) and Cesar Dressing (Bolthouse Cesar Dressing, made with Greek yogurt).
Dinner: tonight I had a bowl of dark chocolate cheerios in my room. Previously, I went to Hammonds, got some kind of pasta (because I really didn't want pizza or hamburger), and knowing I was unlikely to eat the pasta that was limp and looked cold, I also got a whopping 2 meatballs (smothered in what they called, "Kung Pao" sauce) and some white rice (which pained me beyond belief because I had just read about the downfalls of white foods). I wasn't even out of the cafeteria before I knew I probably was not going to be eating the food I'd just been given.
That's another thing: in Hammonds we don't self serve our food. We have to hand our plates/green boxes (which is what you have to use if you don't want to sit in the dining room) to someone behind the counter and point at what you want. And God help you if you ask for less or more than what they give you.
So, back in my room with a box of awful food, I could feel the heartburn before I even started. I took a nibble of the cold pasta, cringed and then attempted the Kung Pao meatballs....bleh. I couldn't bring myself to eat plain rice for dinner. After throwing that away, I turned to my sad storage box on top of my fridge where I keep my small amount of groceries (mainly cheerios and pretzels) and sighed.
I think the most frustrating thing is that I really want and am trying to treat my body better. I love myself and want to be top notch in what is probably the best years of my life, but exercise can only go so far. Exercising without the right nutrients and vitamins is moot. While I may lose the weight now, thanks to Phentermine, if I don't start changing my eating habits, which Ringling is making very difficult, it's all for not. I would chop off my drawing hand for a kitchen with a working stove and oven at this point. And of course it's not like I could get a portable stove, even if my tiny room had the space for it, because it's against the housing policy. I might have caved and gotten a microwave and blender recently, but I just found out I have to get 4 new tires for my car and will also be putting money forward for my apartment next year. Both of which take priority to a microwave.
So I write to you tonight, defeated, frustrated, overwhelmed, underwhelmed, and tirelessly hungry, praying for this semester to go by in a flash so I can come home for the summer and then not have to go back into a kitchen-less living space ever again.
**apologies to the grandparents if this rant was a little graphic and alarming. I'm honestly okay and doing good in my classes, I just tend to get really hangry (hungry + angry).
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